In Korea, drinking is a big part of business culture. These social gatherings, called ķģ (hoesik), are an extension of the office. They help build trust and break down formalities. As an expat, it's important to understand these traditions. This guide will help you navigate the drinking culture in Korean business. Whether you're meeting with colleagues or clients.
Basic Etiquette: Pouring and Receiving Drinks
One of the first things youāll notice is how people pour and receive drinks. In Korea, itās considered rude to pour your own drink. You pour for others and let them pour for you. This is a sign of respect and shows that youāre part of the group.
When youāre pouring a drink, use both hands to hold the bottle. This shows respect. When someone pours a drink for you, hold your glass with both hands. I recently learned that youāre supposed to hold it primarily with your right hand. Iām left-handed, so I have been doing it wrong the whole time.
Drinking with Superiors
Hierarchy is a key part of Korean culture, and this extends to drinking. How you act around senior colleagues matters. Hereās what to keep in mind:
Who Drinks First
In Korean drinking customs, the person of highest seniority at the table typically takes the first sip of alcohol. Itās customary to hold off on drinking until they lift their glass, signaling the start for everyone else.
Seating Arrangement
When it comes to seating, priority is given to the most senior individual, ensuring theyāre offered the best or most comfortable spot at the table. If you happen to be the youngest or the least senior in the group, itās considerate to opt for the least favorable seatāperhaps the one closest to the door or furthest from the center. This understated act serves as a quiet acknowledgment of your role within the social structure, showcasing respect and mindfulness of the groupās dynamics.
Why Koreans turn away when drinking
When drinking with someone seniorāwhether in age, rank, or social positionāitās considered impolite to face them directly while taking a sip. Instead, people turn their heads to the side, often shielding their mouth with their hand or the glass, to avoid showing the act of drinking. This gesture minimizes any perceived rudeness or boldness and maintains a sense of humility.
These customs highlight the respect for hierarchy in Korean culture. By following them, you show that you understand and respect their social norms.
Polite Ways to Decline or Limit Drinking
In some situations, the expectation to drink can make it hard to say no. Especially in a setting that values group harmony. For those who don't drink, or try to limit drinking, these gatherings might feel challenging. To handle this, itās important to set boundaries that match your comfort level. Here are some ways to decline or limit drinking without feeling like youāre stepping out of line:
- Keep Your Glass Full: A simple way to avoid refills is to keep your glass full. People are less likely to pour more if they see you already have a drink.
- Offer to Pour: Focusing on pouring drinks for others can shift attention away from your own drinking. This is a respectful way to participate without having to drink too much yourself.
- Use Simple Phrases: Learn a few polite Korean phrases to help you navigate these situations. These phrases show that you are still engaged while setting clear limits.
- "ģ¤ėģ ė§ģ“ ė§ģ¤ ģ ģģ“ģ" (Oneureun mani masil su eops-eoyo ā "I can't drink much today")
- "ģ²ģ²ķ ė§ģ¤ź²ģ" (Cheoncheonhi masilgeyo ā "I'll drink slowly").
- Mention Health Reasons: Saying youāre on medication or have health concerns is usually respected. This can provide a clear reason for not drinking without prompting further questions.
When to Leave and How to Make an Exit
Business dinners can last a long time. They often end up in a bar or karaoke for the second round (ģ“ģ°Ø - icha). If you need to leave early, there are polite ways to do so:
- After the First Round: Wait until the senior person wraps up the main dinner. Then you can excuse yourself by saying, "ėØ¼ģ ź°ė³“ź² ģµėė¤" (Meonjeo gabogessseumnida ā "Iāll head out first"). Thank the host before you go.
- Express Gratitude: Thank everyone and the host for the dinner. Showing appreciation helps maintain good relationships even if you canāt stay for the whole event.
- Follow Up: Thank your colleagues again the next day. Either in person or through messaging apps like KakaoTalk.
Dealing with the Aftermath: The Next Day at Work
After a night of drinking, the office mood might be more relaxed. It's common for colleagues to joke about the previous evening. Hereās how to handle it:
- Acknowledge the Gathering: A simple, "Last night was fun, thank you!" can go a long way. It shows that you appreciate the time spent together, even if things got a bit lively.
- Keep It Light: If something funny happened, you can mention it lightly. Avoid bringing up anything that might embarrass a colleague.
Korean business drinking culture can seem complex, but understanding it can help you build stronger relationships. Small gestures like pouring drinks for others or turning your head when drinking with a senior show respect and awareness. While there may be pressure to drink, setting respectful boundaries is also part of navigating this culture.
Iāve made plenty of mistakes during drinks, but if you try to follow a few customs, it will be noticed. People will appreciate the effort, and itās a good first step in building deeper connections.